Celebrity Crush: Doug Benson
I'm known for my great taste in men. Really. Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Gene Weaver, Andy Hannan, David Coyle, Derreck Robinson...but lest you think I'm only interested in former teen heartthrobs, 4th grade boyfriends, unrequited grade school crushes, and massive high school football players to let you in on one of my sort-of secret crushes.
You know Doug Benson from Best Week Ever (or any other Vh1 show where they have funny people making comments on random things), from I LOVE MOVIES! on www.bobanddavid.com, and from the Marijuana-logues. Or maybe you really know Doug Benson, in which case put in a good word for me.
Why do I have such an intense crush on Doug Benson? Why would I hands down choose him over Brad Pitt and Joaquin Phoenix? Because on more than one occasion I have read I LOVE MOVIES and snorted water through my nose while at work. Because he is the best part of Vh1 (besides Flava Flav). And because I'm pretty sure that he could make anybody pee their pants. I would in fact challenge somebody to try NOT to pee their pants when watching Doug Benson, because when I had cable I was in need of adult diapers.
So Doug, if you're interested in courting me, you can fight Paul F. Tompkins for my affections. He and David Cross are already engaging in a battle of wits, jokes, and shenanigans to win my hand.
Is this a blatant ploy to get Doug Benson to notice your blog? And to see your blog and marry you? Because if so, them I'm going to start mentioning, in every one of my posts, my celebrity crush...
Morgan Freeman.
Morgan Freeman's penis once saved a man from drowning. That man's name? Dr. Buzz Aldrin.
Yes, it is a blatant ploy! Doug Benson, find this blog and marry me!
so you like luke besson or some shit? well, while you live in a dream land of a goofy quasi-famous guy sweeping you off your feet i will stay in reality maintaining my relationship with ole girl from ghost world.....you know the one....she was in 'the chick with the pearl earing" or some jank. also gina anderson cooper represents......he has a blog he usually updates it but if cant he has one of his bitches do it. peace holmes