Extremely Stupid Emails: Work Edition, Vol. II
Sent with High Urgency, from a woman whose main concern is how the coffee break room is set up and maintained:
Subject: Sugar Bowl
Whoever removed the sugar bowl from the Kitchen on the 14th floor please return it immediately. If you needed to use it for something, there are plenty of bowls, vases, etc in the closets that you could use.
The sugar bowl (really a vase), was replaced mysteriously with a basket today. I noticed, sure, if only because I didn't have to try to shove my hand into a VASE for a sugar packet. This email was sent to BOTH company branches that occupy this floor. Including VPs.
The following is in response to a question posed earlier. The dandy boys at Oxford have deemed the simple past of "smite" to be "smote." In addition, they would like you to know that the perfect participle of the same is, in fact, "smitten." How wonderful it would be to read in the Bible about the Midionites (or some other distantly extinct tribe) having been smitten by the Israelites on their way toward Canaan. It is of course derived from the Anglo-Saxon "smitan," of decidedly Germanic origin.
Jay, good thing that being pretentious is part of your charm.
And Nora, shouldn't you be... I dunno, working?
nora.......mass emails arent all bad. like the one i sent to you where the file name is 'hot latin babes' and when you open it it has eric estrada in a towel flashing on the screen with a siren noise blaring as the words 'your a fag!' pop up over and over again!