Fat Tuesday

Today is THE day for Catholics to get wild before the dullness of Lent kicks off with Ash Wednesday. Even Protestant Britney Spears got into the action, surprising some little girls on Good Morning America with brunch and a shopping trip. Okay, I hate myself for knowing that. How about this example: even people in St. Louis are having a Mardi Gras, which Ryan and Paddy did not attend because their mothers raised them not to give girls shiny things just to see their boobies.

I never really got all that wild for Fat Tuesday, but it's my first year outside of Catholic school, so I kind of miss the discussions of "What are YOU giving up for Lent?" Not that I ever really gave anything up, but I discussed it a lot.

Mainly, girls just used Lent as a diet, like, "I'm not eating potato chips or fries or burgers or ice cream or candy or bread or meat. For Jesus." In grade school I would always give up something like being mean to my brother, and that would last until about 5 minutes after we got home from school when I'd have to smack him up again. (Love you, Paddy).

This year I plan to try and fail to give up Peanut M&Ms for 40 days. I know it seems lame to the average person, but the average person doesn't have the 16-year-old girls at the grocery store say things like, "Just M&Ms and Chips Ahoy again?" while they're ringing them up. It's more about the loss of that reputation than the loss of any weight, although Gil would concur that I most likely have eaten my weight in Peanut M&Ms during the past 4 years.

So what did I do for Fat Tuesday? Did I sit in a bathtub filled with ice cream while I was hand-fed deep fried M&Ms by chocolate elves who regenerate if you bite off one of their hands or ears? No, but I did watch a Nova special about a 20th Century polar expedition that ended in Syphillis-infected Inuits, an icy grave, and possible cannibalism.