And so it is.

On the first day I had my permit, my mother applauded my careful driving. "Good girl, Nora. The thing is, you mustn't ever become complacent. You must be ever vigilant when you're behind the wheel." And no, I am not paraphrasing what she said. I specifically remember it because it stood out as a time when my mother had spoken like a Bronte.

Twenty minutes later, I crashed the new Mountaineer into the tuck-under garage after forgetting which pedal was the brake.

The point of this story is that it is a good ilustration of my life. Things are going pretty well, I think I have the hang of it, oh shit I just crashed a 2-month old car and my dad has burst into the garage threatening to strangle me.

That afternoon, I thought I had figured it out. So many times since I've thought the same thing, and been so devastated when it turned out that I was wrong. But no longer.

How boring I must have been, how terribly vain to think that at 15, at 20, at 23 I would have had it all figured out. No, it just wasn't meant to be that way.

And that's okay, it really is. People are going to disappoint you. Over and over and over again. Situations you thought were ideal will turn out to be anything but. You're going to make a lot of huge mistakes.

It's a new year for me, fiscally speaking, of course. Partially because I really enjoy using the word fiscal and partially because I cannot wait three months to start a new year. New apartment, new borough, new life. And I bought two new shirts today.

But I'm smart enough now to know that it has to be more than a change of location. My father always says, "wherever you go, there you are." It's more than an incredibly pretentious turn of phrase, it's a painful truth. So say what you mean and mean what you say (another Steve-ism). Ask for what you want, because nobody will just give it to you.